NFL/Direct TV Sucks

I’ve been pissed off for two or three days now as the feeling and reality of not being able to watch most of the Vikings’s games this year takes over my entire body…like the pink liquid in those old Pepto Bismol commercials, slowly taking over the stomach.

Why the fuck does DirectTV have exclusive rights with the NFL and when the hell are they gonna get outta that? The largest, most popular sport in the world hasn’t gotten on board with streaming with multiple providers yet? What?

Why is the NFL always so late on everything? Concussion protocol, Kaepernick, minority head coach and front office hirings (still plenty of room to go on those fronts), replaying/challenging pass interference calls, using analytics, going for it on 4th and inches, clock management. They didn’t even start paying taxes until 2015.

Andy Reid won a Super Bowl last year. It took him 21 years as a head coach. Congratulations. Now figure out how to manage the clock. The guy should have at least two more. Just ask Philly fans.

Reid is the perfect poster boy for the NFL not figuring things out in a timely manner.

And the NFL and DirectTV are perfect for each other. Perfect marriage, match made in heaven.

Seriously DirectTV, go fuck yourself. I’ve never had a good relationship with you.

You still freeze up in the wind and cut out when it’s raining. What year is this? Fuck you. I even tried your App last year, as a last ditch effort, when I of course had problems with it and gave you a call, you told me to go door to door and ask my neighbors if they were having the same problem. Great troubleshooting. And trust me I would never bother, I’m the only sucker in my neighborhood to have your service.

Never again.

Any thought to showing a little goodwill here? Maybe getting some good publicity this year? Ya know, not like covid-19, racial injustice, the president being a criminal, or anything else negative is going on in the world right now. Any thoughts on maybe allowing some sort of distribution of your most popular product onto some other platforms for mass public viewing? You know it’s not safe to be in bars or public places right now right? You don’t even have to do it for free, other providers and services will pay big dollars, no worries there, and you’ll get great publicity. You could have your media relations team put out a release that ‘it’s for the fans in these tough times,’ or even spin it like ‘the fans won’t be able to go into the stadiums this year so we want to be able to bring it into everybody’s living rooms!’ etc etc. It can even all be total bullshit. And It can be profitable if you want. I don’t care. Let me watch some fucking football.


I’m so happy your stock is plummeting, you’re completely uncompetitive in the streaming world, and you haven’t been spoken of or relevant in ten years, aside from the Sunday Ticket. And I’m so happy your contract with the NFL is up after 2022 (looked it up after wondering aloud in that 2nd paragraph). It’s the only thing keeping your stone-age company alive. Your company is in a coma, with the NFL Sunday Ticket being the only machines that is keeping you alive.

And all of your health problems would go away if you just allowed me (and the mass public) to watch the NFL this year as we see fit. In 2020, I can’t get on one of a million devices and pay for a game on tv that I want to watch? I’d literally pay 100 dollars a week just to watch for 3 hours, and I’m sure other family men would do that as well, in leu of going to bars. How the fuck is that not a possibility in these times we live in? Think of all the stuff we do everyday with just the touch of a finger. But oh no, not the NFL or DirectTV. They probably struggle to make sure the games they show are in HD.

So thank you NFL and DirectTV. Thank you so much for making it impossible to watch the Minnesota Vikings this year. And thank you for not allowing me to watch my favorite team on opening day for the first time since 2nd grade.

And, oh yeah, fuck you.