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Opportunity

Opportunity

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The moronic use of this word for company positivity purposes pisses me off. It’s pissed me off for awhile now.

It’s insulting to an intelligent individual trying to work his way up in a company. Or just offensive to anyone with a brain trying to figure out how the nature of the English language changed so quickly because somebody in an office somewhere wanted to put a positive spin on employee screw ups. We’re a team right?

Bullshit.

It’s the exact same thing as the asshole in his job interview answering the what’s your biggest weakness question…”I don’t know, I guess sometimes I just care too much and pay too much attention to detail.”

Spare me. At this point you’re not fooling anybody of substance.

(The phonies will love that answer though, I’m sure. You’re their guy, when they go to the higher ups. Which speaks to how phony businesses really are. Can you play the game better than me? If so I respect you...welcome aboard.)

I used to hear ‘opportunity’ all the time in my meetings with my former employer…Some 65 year old meathead who hasn’t been ‘out in the field’ the last 20 years or so, and has no idea what’s really going on, gets the speaking floor, with one foot out the retirement door, looks at his numbers and says, “Hey guys, last week we had an opportunity…” and then proceeds to go on and on, politely and politically correctly, telling us how bad we screwed something up.

The word opportunity is supposed to be a potential future positive…Hey Bucky, I have an amazing opportunity for you, would you like to hear it?

Instead it’s become the insulting positive spin of assholes in suits addressing underlings who were deemed not good enough in one individual situation. I’ve never been at a meeting with five different suits telling the me how well the team acting in a certain situation.

And all they would have had to do is just add ‘missed’ in front of the word ‘opportunity’ for the last 5-10 years and I wouldn’t even me writing this post. It makes so much more sense. Or here’s an idea…

Have some balls…and you don’t even have to be an asshole about it, just be blunt and respectful…at the meeting just say…Hey Division A, we missed a big chance with the marketing team from section B last week. We all screwed it up. Let’s not let it happen again. Everyone be better.

Period.

Now what the hell is wrong with that?

Giving the straight talk might actually save your company some money too…maybe instead of 3-5 idiots in suits to showing up multiple times to tell you about ‘an opportunity,’ perhaps you just need one guy in coveralls, looking everyone in the eye, saying it straight.

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You might be surprised at the results.

The corporate use of the word ‘opportunity’ as addressed to employees from middle management, owners, or stockholders is so misused and old to me. ‘Opportunity’ is supposed to be a future potential positive. Not a past negative.

I strongly suggest and urge anyone in management with the authority to do so…flip the scrip on this company spinning of language bullshit. At this point it’s not fooling anybody. It’s insulting.

Terrible buzzword.

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