A buddy of mine who told me he’s going to be a father of twins awhile back sent me a text today that vaguely read “So my boy weighs 4 pounds 10oz and my girl is right at 4, guess that’s good.”
I thought to myself, wow time flies. It didn’t seem all that long ago he told me he was going to be a father.
I texted him back some congratulatory type message, mentioned how time flies, and asked him to tell me the story.
His response: “Oh you know those fancy ultrasound machines they got these days!”
—His smart-ass response implicating that I had clearly misread his tone, and the kids haven’t been born yet.
He told me his twins are 32 weeks along.
At that moment I thought about when I first met my buddy in the summer of 2015.
A big, tall, goofy mustached, charismatic guy who worked for Dr. Pepper. He went out of his way to help a rooking Pepsi employee in a crowded back room of a Kroger. We’ve been buds ever since.
He’s a good hearted man, who’s always up to date on all the latest buzz words and likes to sling them around in his conversations as much as possible.
That’s what’s up son…etc, etc.
As I got to know him over the next year or so I discovered a truly sweet, generous, caring young man who had a rough upbringing and not much parental guidance or support in his life.
He’s a man who has had some demons. Partly because no one has ever really given him a break in his life and he hasn’t had much help. I could always tell he just needed a nudge in the right direction.
He was always on his own.
Such a good guy.
And I’m proud of how far he’s come along.
In a text I sent his way shortly after he told me he was going to be a father, I told him he was going to be a great dad, his kids will be lucky to have him, and they’re going to love him to death.
And I meant it. I didn’t say all that stuff merely to be nice.
He said something recently about how he is worried about having twins.
It got me to thinking…yeah twins would be tough, but there’s a few added benefits to having them too.
Most of the time couples decide to have two kids anyway right? I’m purely speculating on that but it seems like the most common number of kids for couples to have is two. Maybe because once the kids start to outnumber the adults it becomes a scary prospect for most parents.
So you go through all the stuff you have to with your first child. Raising him or her from infant to 1,2,3,4,5,6 or whatever your age choice is before trying again, then another one comes along and you start the process all over again.
Speaking from a husband, father, and man’s standpoint I know when Tabitha told me she was pregnant with Mara I wasn’t necessarily looking forward to going through all that stuff again.
Starting over with another one: More late nights, diapers, feeding, and everything else you’ve successfully completed with your 2 year old. Now have to turn around and do all over again. Ugh.
But with twins, even though you’ll be doing twice the work at the time, once it’s done, it’s done.
Once the feeding stage is over they’ll be no more buying formula or getting bottles ready ever again. When the potty training is complete you’ll never have to buy pull-ups again.
(Do you have any idea how much formula, pampers, and wipes cost? If you buy all three at once you’re into them for over $100 per store visit. That’s if you buy the big boxes, which is cheaper in the long run.)
If indeed two kids is all you want to have, you’re in great shape with twins once certain journeys have been completed.
It was a big day in our household when we were officially done buying formula, and it’ll be an even bigger one when purchasing pampers comes to an end.
(Big celebration looming on the horizon.)
If we had twins both of these things would be way back in our review mirrors right now.
So even though having twins is gonna be double the work and twice as hard, theoretically it has a lot of advantages on the back end.
Plus, my buddy is having one boy and one girl, so he’ll get the best of boy worlds.
You’re in a very lucky and unique situation my friend. If you’re reading this I say just embrace it all as it comes and remember nothing is ever as bad as it seems when you’re having a rough day. Things always have a way of evening out.
I don’t have any experience with twins, but I’m a proud father. If you ever need any advice on anything I’m a phone call away.
And talking to other people helps. Trust me.